i don’t want to lose her love
so i stand in this
limbo
avoid conversations
that could come up, holding my breath
hoping a poem isn’t read
that leads to questions;
i know this should be easy
but i cannot imagine it will be—
my family loves me,
but what if they reject my
rainbow heart?
what if they say something
more wounding than
“queer girl”
like a stranger shouted at me
one day on my way to work?
i want to be honest,
but i am terrified;
don’t want to lose the people
who love and support me most—
rainbows are supposed to make people
happy,
but i am scared mine will drive
a wedge between all the people i love and me;
i want my family & i want them to want me, too.
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